July was the month we had been counting down to since we found out we were expecting in October. The month our daughter would be born. I joked about how hot it would be. I secretly hoped she would come on my mom’s birthday, July 4th, since her due date was July 6th. I had the cutest 0-3 month swimsuit for her already. I was so ecstatic to have a summer baby.
Instead of feeling joy, I have been feeling dread about July. I won’t be giving birth to my daughter this month. I won’t be bringing her home with me. Life has changed so much since March. Every month that passes just makes me more angry with how unfair the world is. Instead of making plans for July 4, I sit and ponder on ways I can honor my daughter on her due date.
Ellie Paige you are so loved and very much missed.
Loving Ellie Paige 